I’m just a poor, simple man from the street
I ain’t got the sandals to put on my feet
My neighbor is wealthy, he’s hoarding the grain
So I took a little to weather the pain
Oh, surely the jury can pity my plight
The world is so cruel, so my thievery is right
Objection! The law is the law of the land
You cannot just take what is out of your hand
He broke in my storehouse, he shattered the lock
He belongs in the chains on the criminal block
The truth is objective, the statutes are clear
There is no defense for the parasite here
Oh, truth is a costume you wear for the day
It’s all in the rhetoric, all what you say
I can make the weak look incredibly strong
And I can convince you the right side is wrong
Man is the measure of all that is known
Now pay me my fee or you’re pleading alone
Now look at the wealthy man, bloated and grand
Does he really need all the grain in the land
If”goodness” depends on the person in need
Then feeding the hungry is a virtuous deed
I’ve twisted the logic, I’ve altered the frame
The victim is guilty! The system’s to blame
Oh, truth is a costume you wear for the day
It’s all in the rhetoric, all what you say
I can make the weak look incredibly strong
And I can convince you the right side is wrong
Man is the measure of all that is known
Now pay me my fee or you’re pleading alone
The jury is weeping
The verdict is in
Relativism is the way that you win